Some Final Thoughts.
Sadly I had to pack it in and quit the journey, my skin got too damaged to continue. I tried to recover over a couple days at my grandma's but just got worse. I then booked a hotel with a bath tub and epsom salts to see if that could help me but after spending 1 of the 2 nights booked, I knew I had to pack it in and fly home immediately.
I've had a similar situation in the UK before that ended up putting me in unbelievable discomfort and wore myself down to the bone. It took 4+ weeks to recover and feel any comfort again. I knew any more time spent would put myself further behind in recovery and there was no getting better. I can't really say for sure the reason this seems to happen in the UK as in mainland Europe I haven't had the same problem but I would assume climate. But for the severity of distress on my body I can't imagine that is the sole reason. After bathing and lathering cream the moisture doesn't enter my body and I end up dried out within 20 or so minutes (This isn't just dry skin - this is like the rock man from fantastic four, and with the weeping (your body expelling moisture you can't hold) its straight hell.
So even though I feel/felt awful about ending the journey early and was super dissatisfied with the result, I know that it was the only option and it was out of my control. I can't say that I have any intention on returning to the UK after how problematic this has been for me and the level of discomfort is immense. Thankfully this time I'm not bedridden with the inability to sleep but I am very uncomfortable. Maybe this is a tie to my rant/discussion about recovering from sickness/finishing a challenge (Willful Suffering) creating a high level of gratitude when you finish/recover. Hitting 2 birds with 1 stone.
After a few days recovering now and lingering on my journey, I can say that although I'm unsatisfied with the result - I can be proud of what I achieved and looking back at footage, I can see the amount of distress I ignored and continued on.
I can be proud of this as I remember telling myself Day 3 "If my future self told me I completed the south west coast path or reached mid England. I wouldn't believe him" and I can say proudly that I made it a lot further than that through very bi-polar mood swings day to day.
I have never done something like this before - with my longest hike being 6 days. I find with shorter hikes - where you can see the finish line ahead. You can live in the future and tell yourself that "Its only a few more days" but with Lejog there was no such escape. Forcing you to live in the moment and take everything for granted.
I think you can romanticize these trips and when you're actually in them - you can't wait for them to be over. I heard a study that said "You should start planning trips as early as possible, as a large part of the satisfaction is in the anticipation and planning of the experience."
This was a big reframe for me as the initial few days - living in this old mindset of "Its only a few more days" or "You just have to finish" isn't really a viable mindset when you open the map a week into the journey and see your marker hasn't moved an inch. It really causes you to re-evaluate where you are, what you're doing and why. I think this alone was the biggest lesson from my trip.
Because once I accepted this, I had moments of profound excitement/energy/motivation etc. I was living in awe for hours at a time, where I felt invincible. Shifting into this positive mindset you can take negative things for what they are and not let them affect you too much, just sort of laugh it off as you have so many days to go and things to experience.
The midsection around Manchester with staying in hotels and trying to recover from my first skin problems kind of took me out of this mindset as I started battling in recovery and days were more planned and less eventful/instinctive. I once again felt this excitement when reaching the pennines until things got worse again. I wish health problems didn't get in the way but overall this was an incredible experience looking back.